yevamot 109

until the orphaned girl becomes a woman
her husband has no claim on her
and she can still say no.

even if she regrets it later, he cannot force his claim on her before time.
(unlike those Shetziyyon guarantors, who claim a debt before it is due)

yevamot 108

until she becomes a woman
the girl can always walk out
when she realises the realities of being a wife.

yevamot 107

the girl who refuses to marry
will eventually grow up
and become the woman who must.

yevamot 106

the woman who does not want to marry
has to hope that her brother-in-law doesn't know the law,
and will listen and be tricked by the all-powerful judges,
that she hopes are on her side

yevamot 105

fathers & sons

not everyone can step over the holy scholars
only the one who had learnt from his father about children's vows,
but the man who tried to control access to knowledge,
was put in his place, tainted.
and his children suffer the consequences, like the children, and children's children, of Eli.

yevamot 104

imprisoned by not opening her mouth
how important is it to spit or to speak when you have the show to your freedom

the ceremony of halitza involves her reciting a text, removing his shoe and then spitting at him. it is debated on this page if all three things need to happen and need to happen in this order. 

yevamot 103

she must remove that which is firmly fixed on the ground.
- unless if it was used in the service of another who is still contaminated by the snake.

discussed on this page is the use of a wooden leg as a shoe for an amputee in halitza. that the foot should be firmly on the ground. and the shoe should not have been an object used for idolatry. also on this page is a statement from R. Yohanan, Eve had sex with the snake, contaminated humanity. It was only at Sinai did the contamination lift from Israel.

yevamot 102

no matter how tight the shoe is
she has to untie and remove it by herself.

to his humiliation

yevamot 101

how many men need to present for her to publicly be rejected?
3?
5?
7?
or 9?

enough eyes to let everyone know that he didn't want her and build his brother's house with her.

this page starts a new chapter which discusses the ceremony of halitza. the ceremony that is performed when the leverite marriage isn't going ahead. It involved her removing his shoe and throwing it, and her spitting... but it is his decision not to marry her. so really, it is her being rejected. It has to be done in front of The Elders. This page tries to define the number of men needed be a group of Elders. I know of a woman who had to do this ceremony and was forever traumatised by it. She was a young grieving widow, and did not want to marry her brother-in-law. But she also didn't want to spit at him and be a public spectacle as yeshiva guys piled in to watch. It is a very unusual ceremony to still happen. But it does still happen...

yevamot 100

who's the daddy?

children of unknown fathers don't know whose footsteps to follow as they climb the step.

different cases of uncertain lineage, but priests need to know their lineage to know which priestly watch to follow in the Temple rota. the case is a woman who sleeps with one of ten priests, so don't know who the father is but it is definitely a priest. Also on this page is the suggestion that a woman does not go to the granary to collect the terumah, priestly portion, as it might lead to her being alone with the granary worker. and who knows what else would be exchanged....

so, she slept with one of 10 priests. not sure who... but the son is definitely a priest - but which priestly family? that is the case. - just ask her who she slept with doesn't come up... Its about defining the legal parameters of doubtful situations. but when discussing hypothetical situations like this, it is doubtful that it just neutral wrt reality and how to treat non-hypothetical women and their sex lives.

yevamot 99

more unusual mixed-up family situations

brothers, half-brothers, and slaves, who are raised together
share everything.
except for widows and holy food.

yevamot 98

breaking connections

saying goodbye to family members
& to God

Rabbi Akiva teaches two things: a convert can marry his maternal sister. converts are considered newborns, severing prior family relationships. 
& when it says in the text that God spoke to Jonah a second time, it means God did not speak to him a third time. 

thinking about what connects these two teachings - they both involve a loss of relationships. 

yevamot 97

some men sit around telling riddles about those who sleep with multiple family members.
but other men take it into their own hands. forcibly.

this page discusses various scenarios of how one's daughter could end up being one's aunt etc. except it isn't about "one's" but they talk about gentiles being involved in various incestuous situations. not jews... earlier in the page it discusses a man who rapes a woman, is allowed to marry her daughter, or mother, or sister. who would be considered forbidden sexual partners if he had married and not raped the women...

(you could argue that these are just hypothetical situations, extended to absurdity to define the limits of the law - what is the sexual act in terms of bonding a man and a woman together. but my discomfort in reading these hypothetical situations, and the games and riddles of those non-jews, is not hypothetical.  They betray attitudes that are so jarring to a 21st century reading. But racism and sexism still exist... )

yevamot 96

boys acting like adults
& men acting like children

the 9yr old boy (+1 day!) who sleeps around but doesn't settle down
& the man who has a tantrum because his name wasn't mentioned.

and her? who remembers her name?
she could be any one of many sisters and step-sisters


(just going to just go for this... stick with me on this one...)

discussed on this page is how significant is the sex life of a 9 yrs (and a day) old boy. If he sleeps with his dead brother's widow, in leverite marriage, he has not married her. because minors can't marry... Also on this page is a story about R. Yohanan losing his temper, getting very angry because his student didn't quote teachings in his name. There are a couple of attempts to calm him. One of which involves telling of a pair of rabbis who got so angry with each other, they tore a Torah scroll. To add to the absurdity of this page, the whole page begins with a strange situation in the mishna, which one hopes was hypothetical, a man marries a chain of step-sisters, after hearing that each one has died. but gosh - they all turn out to be alive.... you would think that wife no. 4 or 5, after hearing that his ex-wives all mysteriously died without a body/funeral, they would think twice about marrying this perennial widower. 

yevamot 95

it may take two to tango, but when the dance is over, it is her body that has been defiled.
it is her who has become forbidden - locked away from the world.
& he...? he can continue to dance with others who are not connected to the tainted one.

Following the previous page's scenerio, the husband can return to his original wife - who isn't dead after all! hurrah! - leaving his partner, his wife's sister. who has now become forbidden to her original husband - who isn't dead after all. Whoops.

The women are described throughout as being defiled by illicit sex, and have the status of forbidden or not forbidden. She carries that label.... just writing this up to explain the drawing, makes me want to say SEE! THIS is why I don't want to upload these drawings... 

As I was drawing, thinking about the imbalance in the Talmud in the consequences of a sexual relationship, this lyric came on the radio:

and if there was a sequel, would you love me as an equal, would you love me til I die...
'Is it wicked not to care' - Belle & Sebastian

and just the very title sums up my attitude to wanting to disengage from these problematic text, refusing to follow the logic of intermingled relationships of who is forbidden to whom. and resenting the fact that I can actually follow it.... grrrr..... I want to not care... 

yevamot 94

have I mentioned recently quite how much I hate yevamot....? if you have seen me in person, then yes you have probably heard me rant and rage about the way rape is discussed. and sex with children. and how the whole woman is a vessel for the continuation of a dead man's name... but if you are only reading this blog, then my apologies. I have not been updating it, because as much as I rant and rage, I really don't want to write about this, explain it. or spend too much time on it. I am continuing with this bonkers draw yomi project, although I question why daily. I am learning and drawing and ranting and raging. My drawings have become very sparse and simple. trying to spend as little time on it as possible. today's seems innocuous compared to what has been - the wife goes overseas, the husband hears she is dead. he marries her sister. and then - oh dear! wife turns out to be alive after all.... in the comparable situation of husband going overseas and wife remarrying, she has to generally separate from both husbands. but in this scenerio. he goes back to first wife. no harm done. so he slept with his sister-in-law before his wife died. oh well. Sex is something that happens to women and changes their status.... 

at some point I will upload all the yevamot drawings. They are all here, in 2 notebooks. I recently presented this project at Limmud UK, and I was reminded of my first drawing. The one saying the shema with eye open. It was my intention to engage with this text with eyes fully open. Not to look away and close the book when the text got difficult. So, here I am... still drawing with my eyes open. it's just that every so often I might need to wince. 



for the widower there is a lot less to lose if there is a mistake about his dead wife.